With the 2016 elections heating up, we detected a certain aroma wafting on the edge of our senses. It seemed to swirl around the initial announcements of candidacy, proclamations of the respective parties, and spewing Super PAC sewers.
Drawing on the burgeoning pile of righteousness and dubious facts that floated on the rising political tide we were able to capture and concentrate the essence of the collective output of our modern political polemic.
With scent in hand, we did the only practical thing we could... we bottled it up as quickly as possible. With landfills across the US at capacity, and the Yucca Mountain Waste Depository indefinitely closed, we came up with the only viable disposal solution available to us – the American consumer. Out of concern for our fellow citizens we have provided ample warning labels on each container, and even a scratch and sniff early warning and acclimatization system.
We hope that you will do your part as a concerned citizen and help us diffuse the ever growing stench by supporting us on IndieGoGo and taking responsibility for one or more cans of Political Non Scents.
GOP Political Nonscents
DNC POLITICAL NONSCENTS
How can I get my own can of Political Nonscents?
We are currently crowd funding on IndieGoGo. We are seeking to raise a minimum of $50,000. Visit us at IndiGoGo to help us achieve our goal. For $10 you get the can of your choice shipped to you. For $25 you get a 3-PAC. For $100 you get a Party-PAC of 13 cans. For $500 you can form your own Super PAC of 70 cans.
Will you deliver on your promises?
Unlike many candidates, we truly do have a fully formed plan to deliver on our promises.
How do you distill the aromatic essence of American politics?
Through a painstaking process of watching every debate, attending rallies, and engaging with every pollster who calls or knocks on the door.
What is in the can?
Each can of Political Nonscents contains the form and fragrance of manure. Like most of the current crop of candidates, Political Nonscents contains nothing organic or natural, despite claims to the contrary. If you are feeling bold, pop open a can, but be forewarned that like your electoral choices, the scent may linger 4+ years.
Isn't $50,000 a lot of money?
Not in politics. It is less than 1/100,000th of what is anticipated to be spent on the 2016 US elections. We need the funding to get canning machinery (food canneries are not that enthusiastic about handling the essence of American politics), and to meet order minimums on components.
Can I get Political Nonscents after the IndieGoGo campaign ends?
That depends on the political environment. At the moment it appears that there will be no limit of raw materials. We will only be proceeding with production if we meet or exceed our IndieGoGo fundraising goals.
Can I order Political Nonscents in bulk for resale?
Contact us at CampaignManager@PoliticalNonScents.com
Isn’t Political Nonscents offensive
Yes it is!